I have been trying to articulate this for so long, the idea of men's supposed "rationality" in these circumstances actually still being rooted in emotion, but in a different way. Really good piece and such a clear way of explaining it!
This is so good and clear! I've always felt like it doesn't make any sense to blame emotional conflict in marriages on the idea that "men are rational and women are emotional", but I've had trouble putting my finger on exactly the problem. You totally nailed it.
This is a skill I've worked really hard on for a long time. When you start applying it successfully, it's shocking to see how much people just want to be HEARD.
and, if it's still necessary to disagree with their reasoning after all of this (and sometimes it is!) - i've anecdotally found that employing this type of empathy with a friend/partner/family member seems to defuse the intensity of the emotion and creates an opening to discuss other interpretations of a situation. eveeerrryy time.
thank you for writing this. jaw dropped a couple times at how incisive it is. very related to other ways in which we gloss over or normalize men's emotions (eg, anger not deemed emotional and/or it's considered a rational response to an unjust situation)
I have been trying to articulate this for so long, the idea of men's supposed "rationality" in these circumstances actually still being rooted in emotion, but in a different way. Really good piece and such a clear way of explaining it!
Aaaa thank you!
This is so good and clear! I've always felt like it doesn't make any sense to blame emotional conflict in marriages on the idea that "men are rational and women are emotional", but I've had trouble putting my finger on exactly the problem. You totally nailed it.
This is a skill I've worked really hard on for a long time. When you start applying it successfully, it's shocking to see how much people just want to be HEARD.
and, if it's still necessary to disagree with their reasoning after all of this (and sometimes it is!) - i've anecdotally found that employing this type of empathy with a friend/partner/family member seems to defuse the intensity of the emotion and creates an opening to discuss other interpretations of a situation. eveeerrryy time.
thank you for writing this. jaw dropped a couple times at how incisive it is. very related to other ways in which we gloss over or normalize men's emotions (eg, anger not deemed emotional and/or it's considered a rational response to an unjust situation)